Contributed by Marion Moorfoot
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| Artery | The study of paintings. |
| Bacteria | Back door to cafeteria. |
| Barium | What doctors do when patients die. |
| Benign | What you be after you be eight. |
| Cat Scan | Searching for Kitty. |
| Cauterise | Made eye contact with her. |
| Caesarean Section | A neighbourhood in Rome. |
| Colic | A sheep dog. |
| Coma | A punctuation mark |
| Dilate | To live long. |
| Enema | Not a friend. |
| Fester | Quicker than someone else. |
| Fibula | A small lie. |
| Genital | Non-Jewish Person |
| Hangnail | What you hang your coat on. |
| Impotent | Distinguished, well known. |
| Labour Pain | Getting hurt at work. |
| Medical Staff | A Doctor’s cane. |
| Morbid | A higher offer than I bid. |
| Nitrates | Cheaper than day rates. |
| Node | I knew it. |
| Outpatient | A person who has fainted. |
| Pap Smear | A fatherhood test. |
| Pelvis | Second cousin to Elvis. |
| Post Operative | A mail carrier. |
| Recovery Room | Place to do upholstery. |
| Rectum | Pretty near killed him. |
| Secretion | Hiding something. |
| Seizure | Roman Emperor. |
| Tablet | A small table. |
| Terminal Illness | Getting sick at the airport. |
| Tumour | More than one. |
| Urine | Opposite of you’re out. |
| Varicose | Nearby. |